News for the ‘excerpts from my journal’ Category

excerpt from my journal (6)

I got the word wrong, also irrecovacably isnt a word..apparently..where did i get this from

nov 20th

I feel irretrievably lost. To quote Murakami.
I don’t know how to feel these days and I am absolutely annoyed and fed up with everyone.
i came up with a way to deal with things

1. read – when you can’t read then -> 2. write – when you can’t write..then…(points to no. 1)

hopefully that’ll help things.

Posted: November 20th, 2011
Categories: excerpts from my journal
Tags:
Comments: No Comments.

excerpts from my journal (5)

May 27th, 2010

Being a sincere good friend is overrated. No matter what, it’s better to lead a glamorous lifestyle, being beautiful is more important. You may be needed when your friend is upset but they’ll forget when the good times roll by.

Ha HA

true.

don’t know why I wrote this either, someone must’ve been not nice to me, or once again I read too much into nothing

June 27th 2010

What happened today? I watched some soccer and then what? Hmmm…
went out and ate food probably…

probably…

Oh, here’s a really dramatic one

October 6th 2008

I don’t know where I get the courage to hope for you to turn around and look at me. bleh
I don’t know how it is possible for me to go on living like that out of the infinite number of times I’ve attempted to quit you. seriously? but keep in mind, age 19 here
But I know I will one day because you will never turn around.
And I can’t keep staring.
It’s time for me to turn around now.
There’s a world beside you….

I don’t even know who this is about…

Posted: November 8th, 2011
Categories: excerpts from my journal
Tags:
Comments: No Comments.

excerpt from my journal (4)

April 18th 2011

Do you know how painful it is to cry quietly? To not make a single sound while crying?
It’s not so much as the same as covering your ears, to muffle the sounds.
It’s going so far as to face the sky, hoping the gods will grant you the freedom that the gravitation pull will run your tears up your cheek and back into your eyeballs. You must grasp for air by opening your mouth widely and avoid breathing through your nose at all costs.
Sniffling is definitely not allowed, your lips will become dry and chapped from breathing too vigorously from an open mouth.
But that’s the only thing you can do; to bury your tears in a Kleenex; to convince the person sitting in the other room that you aren’t crying.
But most of all, to convince yourself that you’re not crying.
“What an odd season to be having indoor allergies?”

Always remember to exclaim so afterwards.

note: i don’t know why i wrote this, i don’t think i was the one crying….

Posted: October 23rd, 2011
Categories: excerpts from my journal
Tags:
Comments: No Comments.

excerpt from my journal (3)

May 8th 2011

Unfortunately recently some unpleasant events occurred. But I won’t write down what it is. I wonder if in the future I’ll read back on this and that I’ll even know what it was that occurred. No one got hurt so I guess it’s not really a big deal.

note: no I don’t remember what it was, bad things are fleeting, just as good things are

Posted: October 23rd, 2011
Categories: excerpts from my journal
Tags:
Comments: No Comments.

excerpt from my journal (2)

May 12th 2011

I’ve been feeling a little bit restless and a little bit ugly. How did things bring themselves to this point? I just woke up, feeling not the usual refreshment that I had hoped, although awake, but curious as to what the point of waking up was.

ah that’s right, I have to wake up to write.

Posted: October 23rd, 2011
Categories: excerpts from my journal
Tags:
Comments: No Comments.

excerpt from my journal (1)

April 18th 2011

It’s one of those days where I have conversations like this with myself
/headdesk
“What are you doing?”
“Waiting for death.”

The sudden realization that time is moving too quickly sends me into a depression that slows down time. How efficient is this? I sometimes want to sit and cry but that’s too emo isn’t it I don’t even know anymore.

I don’t want to die, I think

note: I definitely do not want to die

Posted: October 23rd, 2011
Categories: excerpts from my journal
Tags:
Comments: No Comments.